Personal Responsibility

Forgive me friends as I take this opportunity to vent about something.  I don't really know who exactly reads my posts, so this may be more therapeutic for me then to actually have someone read it.  Here it goes. When I was growing up I was taught many things but the two of the more important things I was taught was to follow through on commitments and to take responsibility for my actions and decisions. I am often asked what do I exactly do out here on the Rez and depending on my audience, I give the actual answer that I work in the ER or something cynical.  This past week the notion of personal responsibility has resurfaced. I must preface this with the fact that there are people who genuinely come to the ER for emergency situation and need help. I must also point out that, like in every neighborhood, city and state, there are people out here who desperately lack resources to handle certain life changing health problems.  That being said, I would say that 90% of the people I see decide to not take personal responsibility for their decision and actions but instead choose to have an entitled mentality. I am in no means claiming to be an expert in the history between Native Americans and the "white man", but I do know that bad things were done to these people. This was many, many years ago and yes while the reservations do remain, I can tell you that the people here choose to stay. I even know of a few people who have left but for whatever reason decide to return despite the desperate lack of economic choices. On a Friday night, it is not my fault that you did not get you medications refilled before the pharmacy closed, it also not my responsibility to wave my magic wand to make your skin infection go away that you have made worse by not taking your diabetes medications and monitoring your blood sugar, it is also not the pediatrics department's fault that you did not bring your child in for the their school physical and now at the 11th hour you demand one, it is also not my fault that you continue to abuse alcohol and wonder why my team has to restrain you when you come to the ER blitzed out of your mind.  There are many reasons why conditions on most of the larger reservations are so bad and I can only surmise at may of them. But as a "white man" working on the inside but having an outside perspective I have to wonder why it is ok that only one grocery store is allowed on the reservation that makes prices be 3 times higher then other places, why is ok that the federal government provides "rez cell phones" but doesn't help to improve land lines, electricity and running water, why is ok that WIC allowed for so much high fat, high calorie food to be the basis of the food stamp program that has allowed for the obesity rate to be a ton times higher among Native Americans then other races (this is a fact I can prove), why is ok that girls as young as 13 get pregnant by men who are over 18 and this isn't seen as child abuse or statutory rape and why is it ok that nobody does anything about any of these problems? The fact of the matter is, that while I see the lack of personal responsibility on the individual level, I also see it out the township, service unit, tribe and even the national, Washington D.C. level.  It is an absurd concept that I get all worked up over the lack of individual responsibility when we as individuals do nothing to hold the powers above us responsible. The corruption is great on all levels as well. Maybe if we had elected a woman president of this country, the check book would have gotten balanced and the dollar would still be worth something. I am not trying to get into a political discussion or debate. I am just airing my thoughts. I came to AZ naively thinking that I could change things out here. The only thing that changed was MY life and not necessarily for the better. This is the brick wall that I hit my head against on a daily basis and why I am no longer focused on using my skills and knowledge to improve things in my own country. I am focused on helping a community on another continent help themselves.  These people truly have nothing and I have a feeling that my eyes are about to opened wide once again and this time I hope it is for the better.
Thanks for listening.
Rebecca